My Friend Roopak "Roopi Sallu" Saluja
The third? fourth? fifth? in a series of profiles of the interesting people that I have been lucky enough to have met during this long, strange trip.
Roopak "Roopi Sallu" Saluja was one of those guys when he arrived as a fresh-faced, bespectacled, overweight, Mama's Boy in the Spring of 1987 at a small boarding school oh-so romantically tucked away in the foothills of the Himalayas.
By those, I mean an abundantly talented, abundantly charming, abundantly full-of-potential boys that the teachers had scribbled down to eventually win the starting Quarterback job once he got a few years under his belt. [No, we played the soccer version of football back in India, not the NFL version of football. I tried to use this tortured metaphor – or is at an analogy? – to reach common ground with The Better Half, who is a fan of the NFL type of soccer; though, to be fair, thanks to my committed jumping on to the Beckham Bandwagon, she is becoming much more attuned to the soccer version.]
Now, there were two sides to Roopi Sallu. There was that bespectacled, overweight, somewhat studious, tabla-playing side. Then, there was that pop-culture spewing, life-of-the-party, American-accent throwing (his father was the Indian Ambassador to Panama at the time, and apparently the Indian Embassy got all 183 of the channels that DirecTV had to offer back then), wanting-to-be-part-of-the-cool-kids side.
Obviously, these were two fairly mutually exclusive sides and slowly, but surely (as the man himself would say "I'm not slow, and don't call me Shirley."), the latter side began to win out. The wire-frames were replaced by contact lenses (Really? We were allowed to have contact lenses back in school? Maybe they were just fancy designer frames? The memory is always the first thing to go on the wrong side of 30…); the tabla disappeared (no cool kid was ever in the school orchestra); the class sections dipped below 1 (in school the kids were segmented into sections 1 – 4 per subject-block depending on your grades); the debate and drama tryouts never materialized; and a hard-fought invitation to The Musclo Gang was granted.
And, as these things sometimes happen, some kid no one saw coming was handed the proverbial Quarterback (Atul Sabharwal? Kunal Sharma? Gaurav Murgai? Varun Khanna/Sharma? Gaurav Tulli for getting into IIT? That depended on what your definition of being Quarterback is/was.), and Roopi Sallu became another sad part of the Unfulfilled Potential group (like all those first-round Quarterbacks who never "make" it in the NFL).
Of course, since he had known what the other side of the social divide had looked like, Roopi Sallu was nice enough to always spend a little time with people like me. Therefore, I was not surprised when he sought me out a few years later when he made it all the way to the University of Rochester. Something was different about Roopi Sallu. He was skinnier, taller, and more determined to make a serious go of it this time around.
Also, he was wearing contact lenses this time, I am sure about that.
Alas, once again, Roopi Sallu was not going to outrun what was fast becoming his destiny: Unfulfilled potential.
The grades dropped, the attendance sagged, and the weight increased. Finally, Mama's Boy had to be rescued by Mama (and believe me, if you ever needed to be rescued no matter what the situation, you could do a lot worse than Sallu's Mama) and whisked off to…Hungary.
Naturally I assumed that my friend would continue inexorably towards his Date with Destiny, exiled in some backwood Eastern European country I had barely heard off, and the world would forget the story about another talented person who couldn't quite answer the call of greatness.
And, as is usually wont to happen in matters concerning my judgment, I was wrong. Dead wrong.
Just as Prague had become the new Paris, Budapest was now the new Prague. Under the strict guidance of Mama by day, Roopi Sallu excelled at the Budapest University of Technology and Economics; and let loose on the city by night, he DJ-ed at every hip hotspot from, um District I to District X.
Reports flew in from all over the world that Roopi Sallu's Date with Destiny had been greatly exaggerated. A Dosco saw him DJ in Ibiza. Another Dosco saw him become the honcho-in-charge of the Motorola account for Europe, Middle East and Africa at Ogilvy & Mather…in Paris! Paris! Then, news was sent though the Dosco wires that he had started his own record label. His own record label! Admission into INSEAD (next to Hah-vahd, the most famous Business School in the world) followed, after which Roopi Sallu decided, in all his infinite wisdom, that he wanted to go to Bollywood and become an actor.
Ah, there it was. Those familiar sounds of Destiny knocking on his door, the neon Unfulfilled-Potential signs outside his window, and my writing him off…it was déjà vu all over again.
And, this being déjà vu, I was wrong…again.
Roopi Sallu started his own film production company (his own company); co-produced some feature films; made TV commercials; became buff; and then, he put that last piece of the puzzle in place.
Roopak "Roopi Sallu" Saluja managed to grab a role in the very first Hollywood-Bollywood co-production…a co-production he was, um, producing. He was producing it!
Oh yeah, along the way he managed to get engaged to a famous Bollywood actress.
I found this out the old-fashioned way: Headlines in the Society section of the Bombay newspaper while waiting for my flight to Kozhikode/Calicut.
This brings to my mind my favorite quote from my current favorite book [Pessl, Marisha. Special Topics in Calamity Physics. New York: Viking Adult, 2006. 232.]:
"In the end, a man turns into what he thinks he is, however large or small. It is the reason why certain people are prone to colds and catastrophe. And why others can dance on water."
So, people like Atul Sabharwal, Nisheeth Ranjan, Kunal Sharma, Ajay Singh, Bharat Talwar, and Roopak "Roopi Sallu" Saluja, they refused to be bound by what they were supposed to be in The Doon School, and turned into what they have always thought they should be…and learned to dance on water.
As for me? While I am happily being prone to colds and catastrophes in my cubicle-dwelling-thankless-job-with-a-solid-middle-class-salary life. I shoulda had Sallu's Mama rescue me as well!
The basu! Guide to the Movies
(The My-God-It's-Almost-Fall ! Edition)
10 August – 17 August 2007
The b! List
Ten things that are the best, ever (currently)!
1. Anil Kumble. India's greatest Unheralded Soldier quietly put the cherry on a remarkable career by becoming the only Indian to score a century during the just-won Test Series against England with his maiden, um, Test Century. He truly is the epitome of that hoary old plays-the-game-the-right-way cliché. Well done! http://tinyurl.com/24ncb2
2. Danny Boyle. There are few directors working in cinema today who can construct such compelling beauty with sound and images working together in perfect harmony, and make you overlook horrendous third-act story problems like he does in Sunshine. http://tinyurl.com/2ruko5
3. Jelena Jankovic def Sybille Bammer at the Home Depot Center, Cason, CA. Powerful, precise hitting never looked this good. http://tinyurl.com/3x6u5a
4. Hard Knocks: Training Camp with the Kansas City Chiefs [HBO, Wednesdays, 10 ET/PT] . Are you ready for some NFL version football? http://tinyurl.com/2oqnqh
5. Madonna and Gogol Bordello's "La Isla Bonita". Quite simply the highlight of the recently concluded Live Earth concerts. http://tinyurl.com/2oje2p
6. "Guillermo in The Bourne Identity". As always, colleague "Bad" Andy Abdelmalek manages to unearth a gem. http://tinyurl.com/2v78mg
7. Novak Djokovic. How incredible was his feat of upsetting the God-like Roger Federer in the finals of the Montreal Masters? Well, after going through Andy Roddick and Rafael Nadal, he was responsible for Federer's tenth loss against 46 wins in finals since 2003! http://tinyurl.com/2x69kh
8. Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations [Travel Channel, Mondays, 10 ET/PT] . Who knew travel could be this ornery and be this much fun? http://tinyurl.com/268tds
9. Brandon Webb. 42 innings with no runs…in a row . http://tinyurl.com/2g74qv
10. "Sgt. Pepper's at 40…a Beatles Celebration" at the Hollywood Bowl. Cheap Trick; Aimee Mann; Joan Osborne ; Ian Ball (from Gomez); and especially Al Jourgensen and Sin Quinn (from Ministry), made it a wonderful night to remember. Man, Jourgensen and Quinn's cover of "I Want You (She's So Heavy)" was something else! http://tinyurl.com/ysgvtd
One to Watch: My Friend's In a Movie!
Marigold
Directed by: Willard Carroll
Starring: Ali Larter, Salman Khan, Nandana Sen, and Roopak Saluja
Plot: A Hollywood actress accidentally becomes immersed in Bollywood films. Something-tells-me-there-might-be-a-clash-of-cultures type complications ensue.
The basu! Buzz: Ah my dear old Roopak "Roopi Sallu" Saluja – how it makes me smile to see you all grown up and becoming a Bollywood mogul. Well done!
Bottom Line: Those Lucky Few in Jackson Heights and Artesia: Theatres – Eventually; Other, Less Fortunate Souls: DVD
Other Movies to Check Out (as well): Bollywood/Hollywood; My Bollywood Bride; The Guru
One to Watch: It's Judd Apatow's World…We Just Live In It
Superbad
Directed by: Greg Mottola
Starring: Jonah Hill, Michael Cera, Seth Rogen, Bill Hader
Plot: Two losers try to get to know women in the Biblical sense before their imminent graduation from high school. I-can-relate-type complications ensue.
The basu! Buzz: I made the mistake of not watching Knocked Up when it was released earlier this year. I am not going to make that same mistake with this film.
Bottom Line: Theatres – First Week
Other Movies to Check Out (as well): The 40-Year-Old Virgin; Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy; The Cable Guy
Ones to Watch: It's Them Pesky Truthful Documentaries Again
The King of Kong: A Fistful of Quarters
Directed by: Seth Gordon
Starring: Steve Weibe, Billy Mitchell
Plot: A sweet challenger must take down the arrogant champion at the legendary arcade game Donkey Kong. I-was-as-surprised-as-you-to-find-out-that-these-guys-do-get-chicks type complications.
The basu! Buzz: I know what you're thinking…this would make a great fiction film. Well, apparently so did the directors who already have a deal in place even though the documentary has barely hit theatres. Hmm, were they just using this charming little non-fiction film as a steppingstone into the more lucrative world of Hollywood fiction films? Smart boys!
Bottom Line: Those Lucky Few in Manhattan and Los Angeles: Theatres – Eventually; Other, Less Fortunate Souls: DVD
Other Movies to Check Out (as well): Hoop Dreams; When We Were Kings; Pumping Iron
The 11th Hour
Directed by: Leila Conners Petersen and Nadia Conners
Starring: Leonardo DiCaprio
Plot: A documentary urging people to act before it's too late and the Earth is doomed. God-bless-those-Prius-drivers type complications ensue.
The basu! Buzz: Dude…if anyone can get through our collective apathy of this apparently inevitable environmental Armageddon we are facing, it has to be Leo, right? Something tells me that little girls all over the world will start recycling their Tiger Beat magazines.
Bottom Line: DVD
Other Movies to Check Out (as well): An Inconvenient Truth; Who Killed the Electric Car?; A Crude Awakening: The Oil Crash
One to Watch: The Sixth and Final Stampeding Three-quel [For Now]
Rush Hour 3
Directed by: Brett Ratner
Starring: Chris Tucker, Jackie Chan, Roman Polanski, Max von Sydow
Plot: A Chinese officer is forced to partner with an LAPD detective to combat an organized Chinese crime family in…Paris. A-very-different-look-at-the-City-of-Lights type complications ensue.
The basu! Buzz: A few years too late, I suppose. Interestingly enough, Tucker has not made any movies apart from the ones in this franchise for the last ten years. After this movie's middling box office, I suppose the prospects for his continuing career can best be described by that old slim-to-none-and-slim-just-left-town cliché.
Bottom Line: DVD
Other Movies to Check Out (as well): Rush Hour 2; Shanghai Knights; Supercop 2
One to Watch: Woody Allen Lite
2 Days in Paris
Directed by: Julie Delpy
Starring: Adam Goldberg, Julie Delpy
Plot: A relationship is put to the test when a couple visits the girl's family in Paris. Ah-the-bittersweet-romance-of-the-City-of-Lights type complications ensue.
The basu! Buzz: I completely and utterly Heart Goldberg. I have fond feelings for Delpy (mostly from that unforgettable line from the An American Werewolf in Paris trailer: "'Twas not a dog, 'twas a werewolf!"). For me, that is enough to try and seek out this film before it nestles into its rightful place in everyone's Netflix queue after Before Sunrise and before Before Sunset .
Bottom Line: Me, and Other Fans of Adam Goldberg and Julie Delpy: Theatres – Eventually; Other, Less Enlightened People: DVD
Other Movies to Check Out (as well): After Sunset; Before Sunrise; An American Werewolf in Paris
One to Watch: Rushmore Lite
Rocket Science
Directed by: Jeffrey Blitz
Starring: Reece Daniel Thompson, Anna Kendrick, Nicholas D'Agosto, Vincent Piazza
Plot: An intelligent social outcast with a stutter gets a shot at redemption when he's asked to join his high school debate team by a pretty girl. Ain't-wish-fulfillment-fantasies-grand? type complications ensue.
The basu! Buzz: Rushmore -lite it may be, but since I am such a massive fan of Rushmore, I have no choice but to check it out.
Bottom Line: Me and Other Dedicated Fans of Rushmore : Theatres – Eventually; Other, Less Sensible, People: DVD
Other Movies to Check Out (as well): Rushmore; Lucas; Some Kind of Wonderful
Ones to Watch: Those Indomitable Little Counter-Programmers
Death at a Funeral
Directed by: Frank Oz
Starring: Matthew Macfadyen, Ewen Bremner, Alan Tudyk, Rupert Graves, Peter Dinklage
Plot: A patriarch's death brings a family together with surprising results. Anytime-you-get-the-whole-family-together-it-brings-surprises type complications ensue.
The basu! Buzz: My ex-professor Elizabeth Gill-Brauer and her husband Jon Brauer watched this film and recommended it. That's good enough for me.
Bottom Line: Theatres – Eventually
Other Movies to Check Out (as well): Kingdom Come; Greedy; Four Weddings and a Funeral
Delirious
Directed by: Tom DiCillo
Starring: Steve Buscemi, Elvis Costello, Gina Gershon, Michael Pitt, Alison Lohman
Plot: An aspiring actor slash paparazzo assistant is torn between his budding relationship with a pop diva and his duty to his boss. Ooh-talk-about-irony type complications ensue.
The basu! Buzz: DiCillo, of course, made one of the best, if underrated, indie films of the 90s: Living in Oblivion. Perhaps it was no irony that one of the best indie films of the 90s was an indie film about the making of an indie film (apparently inspired by the troubles DiCillo had with Brad Pitt on Johnny Suede)…those were highly meta times back then.
Bottom Line: Those Lucky Few in Manhattan and Los Angeles: Theatres – Eventually; Other, Less Fortunate Souls: DVD
Other Movies to Check Out (as well): Living in Oblivion; Johnny Suede; Double Whammy
Them
Directed by: David Moreau and Xavier Palud
Starring: Olivia Bonamy, Michaël Cohen
Plot: A couple is terrorized in their remote house on the outskirts of Bucharest. Sometimes-real-estate-can-literally-be-murder type complications ensue.
The basu! Buzz: Ah the French, again they take a limited genre exercise and manage to make it something more. Moreau and Palud better improve their English – Hollywood will soon be beating down their door for the inevitable remake.
Bottom Line: DVD
Other Movies to Check Out (as well): The Blair Witch Project; Night of the Living Dead (1968); The Evil Dead
Movies
The Invasion
Directed by: Oliver Hirschbiegel [and The Wachowski Brothers]
Starring: Nicole Kidman, Daniel Craig, Jeremy Northam, Jeffrey Wright, Veronica Cartwright
Plot: A woman must keep her son from harm after an extraterrestrial virus starts turning people into emotionless automatons. Doesn't-Corporate-America-do-that-already? type complications ensue.
The basu! Buzz: Now, I haven't seen Downfall , but The Better Half and my colleague Bartley Edmund Jenniches IV assure me that it's a devastatingly good movie. Therefore, I was a bit surprised that über-producer Joel Silver (it must kill him to be this far behind Jerry Bruckheimer these days) was surprised when reportedly the first cut turned in by director Hirschbiegel was a moody, claustrophobic, intelligent thriller that was as much a commentary on current events as it was a genre film. I mean, did he really expect something different when he hired the guy? I suppose that he thought if Abel Ferrara of all people could be handled to make the last of these remakes, then this would be a cinch to handle. Instead, he had to get the Wachowski Brothers to do a series of rewrites, and then added James McTeigue (the Wachowski crony who "directed" V For Vendetta) into the mix to direct the reshoots. And, in the end, he got a big fat box office goose egg to show for all his meddling. Serves him right. I hope he has the good taste to have the two differing versions duke it out on DVD à la the last Exorcist film (I hate to admit it, but Renny Harlin's low-brow Exorcist: The Beginning, was better than Paul Schrader's pseudo-intellectual Dominion: Prequel to the Exorcist).
Bottom Line: DVD [The Oliver Hirschbiegel Version]
Other Movies to Check Out (as well): Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1956); Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1978); Body Snatchers (1993)
Stardust
Directed by: Matthew Vaughn
Starring: Claire Danes, Robert De Niro, Michelle Pfeiffer, Peter O'Toole, Ricky Gervais, and the great Rupert Everett
Plot: An unwitting young man has to protect a fallen star…which turns into a woman…and is sought out by flying pirates, witches and…um, things like that. A-fantasy-adventure-with-literally-everything type complications ensue.
The basu! Buzz: My colleague "Bad" Andy Abdelmalek is a serious comic book, sorry graphic novel, aficionado. And I mean "aficionado" in the scholarly sense of that term, not just the mindless consumption of such (which is where I come in). According to "B"AA, the comic book, sorry graphic novel, this film is based on was created by the legendary Neil Gaiman and was very good. Well "B"AA, I wish Paramount (Worst Movie Studio, Ever!) had bothered to consult with you before their nonsensical marketing campaign for this film – it would have had a much better shot at getting the audience it deserved, rather than joining Daddy Day Camp (My God!) at the bottom of the box office heap.
Bottom Line: "Bad" Andy Abdelmalek and Other Fans of Comic Books, Sorry, Graphic Novels: Theatres – Eventually; Other, Less Sensible People: DVD
Other Movies to Check Out (as well): The Princess Bride; Willow; Labyrinth
Descent
Directed by: Talia Lugacy
Starring: Rosario Dawson, Chad Faust, Marcus Patrick
Plot: A young woman seeks revenge on the man who violated her. Not-exactly-your-prototypical-female-empowerment film type complications ensue.
The basu! Buzz: I called my friend Aniket "Ani" Khosla one evening and asked him if he wanted to go see Irreversible with me. Sure, he said, why not. So, the poor chap gave up his Friday evening and joined me at one of the most adrenalizing movie experiences anyone can ever hope to have (I'm not saying it was a good film, a bad film, or condoned its misogynistic/un- misogynistic themes one way or the other…I'm just saying it was a never-had-my-heart-beat-so-hard-at-a-movie movie.). Now, just because I am curious about this distaff re-treading of similar terrain, doesn't mean you have to be as well.
Bottom Line: Me, and Other People with Strong Stomachs: DVD
Other Movies to Check Out (as well): Irreversible; Kill Bill Vol. 2; The Bride Wore Black
The Last Legion
Directed by: Doug Lefler
Starring: Colin Firth, Ben Kingsley, Aishwarya Rai, John Hannah, Peter Mullan, Rupert Friend
Plot: A deposed Roman ruler tries to take back Rome with the aid of a legendary sword and some friends. 300-meets-Excalibur-meets-King -Arthur type complications ensue.
The basu! Buzz: I Heart Firth. I do feel sad that he has to make derivative junk like this and have to endure the on-set diva behavior of Rai. Poor chap.
Bottom Line: Me, and Other Fans of Colin Firth and Derivative Junk: DVD; Other, More Sensible People: Pass
Other Movies to Check Out (instead): 300; Excalibur; King Arthur
Daddy Day Camp
Directed by: Fred Savage
Starring: Cuba Gooding Jr., Lochlyn Munro, Richard Gant, Brian Doyle-Murray
Plot: Emboldened by the surprising success of their daycare center, two fathers decide to try their luck with their old summer camp. Sometimes-the-entrepreneurial-spirit-is-overrated type complications ensue.
The basu! Buzz: Cuba Gooding Jr. is an Oscar winner. Just think about these horrifying words…an Oscar winner!
Bottom Line: Pass!
Other Movies to Check Out (instead): Doctor Dolittle (1967); Nanny McPhee; Mary Poppins
The Top 10 Movies of 2007
Ratatouille [Tie]
SiCKO [Tie]
Sunshine (new entry) [Tie]
The Bourne Ultimatum (new entry)
300
Zodiac
Hairspray
Transformers
La Vie en Rose
Eklavya
The Simpsons Movie (new entry) [honorable mention]
Top 10(-ish) Films Out Right Now That I Positively Have to See
The Lives of Others
The Devil Came on Horseback
No End in Sight
Rescue Dawn
Knocked Up
Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix
Once
Molière
My Best Friend
Becoming Jane
Shrek the Third